Allow freedom of expression in fashion, music, interests and pastimes, So long as our bottom lines are met – your children must be safe kind and conscinetious. Cut them a bit of slack around the things that matter to them but don’t have to matter to you.
Respect privacy. Let the older children open their own post, have private telephone conversations and close the door when they have friends over to play. A respect for your child’s privacy is unlikely to compromise their safety.
Offer wall space. If you have a newly decorated house, put up pin boards in your children’s bedroom so they can customise a bit of wall without getting into trouble. Use brightly coloured map pins that are easy to spot if they fall out.
Have secret signals. If public displays of affection embarrass your child, develop your own code it could be a low five for a kiss and a gentle punch on the arm for a hug. Big kids need affection, but are much more likely to accept it on their own terms.
Make sure that you have your family photos at least once a year, so you will have your memories to cherish forever.